The man is afraid of women " Chatter " Fall in love by clinic

The man is afraid of women " Chatter " Fall in love by clinic

Zhang YiJun's EQ expert, person in charge of Zhang YiJun's EQ club, Georgia Institute of Technology of U.S.A. (Georgia Institute of Technology) The doctor of psychology, has taken the post as the university professor for 11 years, it is active to the psychological expert of the media, no matter>, " psychological interview ", " deformation is counted ",etc. the program honoured guest presides over, reputable enterprise trainer.
Why does the woman like chattering?
As to a lot of men, this is really an irritating eternal strange case, it seems to be one's own painful main source too, an investigation reveals, in the thing that the man hates women to do, the ones that ranked the first are " instigating and chattering " ,The ones that are far higher than ranking by second " Do not like dressing up " . It seems even always lustful man would rather stand ugly woman, too unwilling to stand, chatter woman, you can well imagine the severity of this state of affair.
Discover, the woman can be twice of the man's if saying in one day, so seem in this way, the woman really likes chattering even more than the man.
If should weigh carefully, the movements that the woman is deemed to chatter by the man, in fact include different contents:
( 1) Repeated order: The woman issues order and can not be responded, will require (but not asks) to the man repeatedly constantly ,For example: "When on earth do you go to change the bulb? "
( 2) Care about and remind: Even a warning out of goodwill, so long as not what the man wants to hear, calculate that chatters: "Do you take medicine today? " Or: "Lower the temperature today, don't forget to wear more clothes. "
( 3) Praise others: What the woman expressed is appreciating to others' words and deeds sometimes, but if the man thinks the woman is with the tongue in the cheek, this calculates too that chatters: "Lao Wang next door bought a famous-brand bag and saw madam off on Valentine's Day of this year, she is showing off to everybody proudly! " Or: "It is said Lao Wu can repair the electric apparatus very well, anything is bad, he can settle 0.15 kilograms when leaving! "
( 4) Share the worry: Let woman feel grievance this kind probably, two people see the surface with great difficulty busy one day most, tell you the idea at heart, just show we are intimate like former times. But the man wants to relax after coming off duty, it is perfectly contented to read a newspaper quietly, at this moment if the woman expresses thousands and thousands of words, it is not really too sensible: "Office little Xu and Xiao Chen roar each other have a meeting, today, the manager wanted me to coordinate their conflict unexpectedly "
To woman, these are the function completely different linking up the form of contents, but reached men into the ear, all turn into the same kind of definition: " instigate and chatter " .
What the woman should understand is, the way of communication that basically only makes the man vexed, even if chatter, ha! This has explained too why the man thinks women all like chattering all the time, but the woman will only admit oneself " Very once in a while" Difference that will chatter.
Then, why is the man afraid of chattering?
( 1) Represent garrulously power is low: Only can order the person with low power in power one high, the woman is requiring the order constantly, meaning the transfer of power, the man is not certainly well.
( 2) Imply garrulously ability is insufficient: The man thinks I do things and have a sense of propriety by oneself, order of importance and emergency can all be mastered, where to need the instructions of others, so hear the woman say this says that, think she puts and understands the ability to distrust me.
( 3) Show garrulously it is not happy enough: Perhaps the woman thinks that it shares the worry, hear men are translated into " you are blaming me to make you happy " in the ear to speak ",Not wanting you, bitter where a so many one come? And serve heartedly every day by oneself, unexpected she is still unhappy, think the man is the more depressed.
How does the woman does, can reduce to give the other side the feeling of chattering?
( 1) Tell one's own purpose first: Please don't open longwinded, tell him the real purpose of your these words first, in case that the purpose that his brother will be wrong, will blame sharing by mistake. For example:
"I have no meaning that is all your fault, I hope to share the mood with you "
"I do not want to instigate troubling you at all, so if you can tell me a precise time, I am on knowing what's what in the heart, will not ask to you! "
(It persuade answer man,it cost ones that lure so as to,tell what advantages he be had on he to do so. )
( 2) Give to men some and stare flankly for time to charge: He enter door you speak, manifestation intelligently greatly, the clever woman will choose time, chooses the mood and opens one's mouth, might as well tell him first:
"I know you work hard today, first I am not noisy, you, let you have a rest, when you have mood that speak, may I to look for me? "
Thus, he, on having enough mood energy to look after your mood after having a rest.
( 3) Talk about " you " little ,Talk about " I " more : Been opening and saying all the time while complaining " You " ,It is very apt to let the other side produce the thought that oneself defends, therefore begin to debate endlessly, for example:
"How to say you turn a deaf ear to ? "
Please try multi-purposely " I " Begin:
"I do not think some are paid attention to ? "
Having known these communicative skills, the bitterness that you and he would not be chattered, and can enjoy the happiness of communicating happily!


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